Be careful what you wish for...... a story about desire and the reprecussions of its manifestation.....

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2006-06-03

Sarah and i had been going out for 6 months. After a while, our relationship simply lost its spark which led to our inevitable break-up. We broke up amicably, however, and ended up getting back together a few months later. Sarah was quite beautiful (at least to me), sporting beautiful brown hair that flowed down her back, gorgeous eyes, a cute 5'0 petite figure, a decent bust, and sexy tannish-white-ish skin. On top of that, she had a cool personality. Very spunky. Had a tendency to be bitchy, but overall, a nice girl, though not sweet. I, on the other hand, am more of an average looking guy. Well, that's what I think, anyway. Alot of people say i'm quite good looking, but most of that is probably bullshit. Pleasantries and what not. I have short blonde hair, a decent body though nowhere near addonis-esque, "gorgeous, deep eyes" according to Sarah, an overall hot face (again according to Sarah), and soft pale skin.
Sarah and i had alot in common. The only area in which we greatly differed ideally was sexuality, go figure. Sarah wasn't conservative or a total prude, but her idea of sex was very different from mine. She had been molested as a child by a next door neighbor when she was 13 years old.

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   He didn't fuck her, but he felt her up and made out with her. She did all of this as her father watched. Apparently, her father had developed a voyeuristic fetish. He preferred watching instead of partaking. He was also somewhat of a pedophile, if you hadn't guessed already. Sarah was a catholic school girl, and man oh man, did he admire those skirts. Honestly, i get off to the whole school girl look, too, minus, you know, the pre-pubescent/early pubescent girls part. I have a pretty filthy mind, but i'll go more in depth with that later.
So anyway, she said she wanted to have sex with someone she was married to. We literally did everything else in the book except sex. Now, i'm not a total asshole who only cares about sex. However, our relationship needed it. I wanted it, and despite what she would tell me, she wanted it, too. We had every reason in the world to do it, but she didn't. After a while, the relationship became far too routine.

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   I actually loathed being around her, at one point. I broke it off gently, and we agreed to go our separate ways.
Another reason i broke it off with her was a few uncomfortable vibes i picked up from her during our makeout/fooling around sessions. I dunno. . . . it just. . . . sometimes i got the feeling that she was subconciously trying to recreate the whole scene of her molestation while we fooled around. I'm a dirty guy, but doing something like that is a little too dirty, even for me. . .

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  . . .
However, i'd be lying if i said i never had the urge to ask her if she still had the schoolgirl outfit around. She would've looked soooooo hot in it. Those knee socks crawling up her hot skinny legs, exposing the soft inviting flesh of her thighs. . . . the hint of her panties, all covered by her plaid or grey skirt. Her blouse with the top button unbuttoned, inviting me to check out her small rack. . . . .

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   The look of repressed lust on her face. . . . . Sarah would've fit the role perfectly. . . . . . . . Often times, i would fantasize. .

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  . . . i would create scenarios in my head where Sarah and i didn't necessarily know each other too well. . . . . where she had to come over to my house to work on a prject with me, after school. . . . . i would fantasize about great sexual tension between the both of us. .

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  . . . . we would flirt back and forth, me checking out her body and panties whenver i got a shot. . . . . eventually, we would start doing stuff. . . . .  I jacked off to this image in my mind God knows how many times.

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  . . . . i so wanted to make it a reality, but never had the balls to try. . . . . . Like i said earlier, when Sarah was on, she was on. But other than that, i always figured she was never as open minded as i was when it came to sex. Boy would i turn out to be wrong.
So anyway, here i am, a single man. As i said earlier Sarah and i would eventually get back together a few months later, which begs the question.

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   What went down in that 3 month gap? I lost my virginity. . . . from a certain point of view. . . . .
Being the flithy pervert i am, i had developed a predilection for anal sex. It seemed so forbidden. . . . .

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   so dirty. . . . . and it seemed like it felt awesome, too. The though of cumming deep into someone's ass would send me into orbit. Sarah obviously couldn't fulfill this fantasy, so i had to look elsewhere. . . . . . and now that i was out of the realtionship, i knew just where to get it. .

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  . . . . .
A guy i know named Matt had a younger brother, two years to be exact. His name was Brian and he was about 18. I was 20. Brian wasn't exactly a ladies man. . . . he was actually kind of a loser. . .

 

  . well, not really. Just one of those stoner losers. On top of that, he was Bi, which kind of explained why some people didn't like him. He never really admitted he was bi, but at the same time, he wasn't in the closet. If that makes any sense.
So anyway, when Matt went away to college, we started hanging out more. Occasionally, we would smoke some weed together. It wasn't until a couple of months before i broke up with Sarah that strange things started happening between me and Brian. . . . . confusing things. He always walked around in his tight white briefs with a shirt on.

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   I never saw any problem with this. It's not like i checked out guys, or anything. . . . well. . . . . that is. . . . until i started checking him out.

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   I don't want to make excuses or seem like i'm in denial. . . . . i'll admit i was turned on by Brian, at one point. However, being that i was at my sexual peak at the time.

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. . . . insane when it came to the though of anal sex. . . .

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  .  knew he was bi. . . . . . and the fact that him and i would wrestle each other and get kind hard. . . . . . . well, i don't think i have to explain anymore.

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   It was co-association combined with other factors. Like i said, i'm not into guys. In fact, Brian is the only dude who ever turned me on, but not necessarily him, per se. The acts themselves. The thought of wrestling erotically in a pair of briefs with him while we ignored the 800 lbs. gorilla in his bedroom that was our mutual desire for each other. The though of him being my bitch while he sucked my cock. . . . . and me pulling down his briefs, sticking my dick up his ass, and fucking him while he moaned and screamed. . . .

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  . .
I was determined to fulfill this fantasy. It wasn't exactly hard (no pun intended) to do it, either. As i mentioned before, we'd often wrestle with each other for hours. Both clinging to one another. I was almost always the only one who ended up on top, pinning him to the ground, but he never seemed to have a problem with it. In fact he often smiled whenever i had him in a pinning predicament or some kind of submission. If i'd sit on his chest, sit on his back, straddle his stomach, give him a bear hug. . . . he made this giggle that kinda turned me on. . .

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  . . . . . . . . . . . we ould often engage in these hot wrestles even when i was going out with Sarah, but i knew i couldn't cheat on her. Brian and i almost hooked up God knows how many times. . .

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  . . . .
So once i broke up with Sarah, i called him up. I went to his house, where we did our usual wrestling. This time, though, i wanted to make the message clear that i wanted his ass. So i wore briefs. When we stripped, he gasped in awe. As we both stood there in our briefs, boners poking through the cotton, i checked him out. Brian wasn't a bad looking guy. Pretty skinny, but had a better body than me. I'm not a good judge when it comes to guy's looks, but he had a handsome, healthly looking face. He was a few inches shorter than me, at 5'8.
We then started wrestling.

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   We began with a huge bear hug, where we just stood there clinging to each other for a few moments. Of course, i could've easily taken him down right then and there, but i wanted to enjoy this. After all, this was it. I was going to fuck Brian. I wanted to savor it. Finally, i let him take me down, and rolled over on my stomach. He sat on my back for a few minutes until i pushed him off and gave him a headlock. I eventually let him out of it but maintained control by keeping him lying on his stomach. It was time to ring the dinner bell. I pulled down his briefs and spanked his left ass cheek. He giggled and got up after i stood up. He looked at me with a smile and giggled. We then started wrestling again and i took him down once more. I spread myself across his back as he lay on his stomach. He grinded his brief clad ass into brief clad cock, and i almost came right then and there.

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   We then wrestled around for a few moments until i finally pinned him down. I had him by both of his wrists, and had the rest of my body weight on his stomach. Gradually, i just lay myself on top of him. It was almost as if i was resting. We stood that way for a minute until he finally made a move. My lip was on his cheek. Coincidentally, he grabbed my butt cheek. We looked at each other and made out. We made out for a minute until i stood up and pulled down my briefs freeing my red, hard cock. He took it in his mouth and blew me for a couple of minutes until he stopped. He said that i had to reciprocate. He wanted me to grab either grab his hard dick for his pants or lick his ass. My mouth watered at the thought of licking his smooth hairless ass, and proceeeded. He moaned until i stopped. I told him i wanted to fuck his ass.

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   He smiled and agreed. I slapped on a condom, greases my weasel, and spread his cheeks apart. His pink asshole looked oh so inviting. I pushed my dick up his tight pink butthole. I fucked him silly in front of his mirror and got turned on by the expressions he made as pumped the hell out of him and his whimpers and moans. Finally, i came.
Afterwards, i felt really awkward and guilty. W talked and i told him not to expect a relationship or anything out of this. He said he was fine and only liked to mess around with guys sexually. He, like myself, could never fall in love with another man. Relieved, i went home. We still hung out with nothing funny at all happening between us. He was a cool guy i could trust. Or so i thought.
So Sarah and i eventually start hanging out together again, and low and behold, my feelings were rekindled.

 

   We hooked up and talked about getting back together. She said she never lost her feelings for me. This was pretty much the same thing that all her friends told her. I was a happy man. I had everything i wanted. Except one thing, which would eventually cost me my relationship.
She asked me if i had been with anyone during our hiatus. . . . i lied and said no. . . . big mistake that would eventually come back to haunt me.

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   I tried talking to her about sex, but she still didn't want to. Well. . . . she did. . . . . but not with me. She blushed as she told me. I was hurt. I didn't know what to think. Why would she want to have sex with someone else and not me, her boyfriend? More importantly, who was the little prick? I asked her and she said no one in particular.

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   She described the way she wanted it, and the more she told me, the more i believed her when she said it wasn't anyone in particular. She wanted me to watch her while she fucked another guy. Now who does that remind you of? Her father. Of course. It made sense. I was right all along, she DID subconcsiously long to recreate that sexual experience form childhood.
So i basically put a label on the whole thing. Menage trois. A three way. She said yeah, i guess. She wanted it with me and another guy. I had no problem with this. I had a similar fantasy once. . .

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  . involving Sarah and another guy. . . . . a guy named Brian. It turned me on to no end. I never told her about my experience with Brian, but this would work out perfectly. She agreed to do it with him.
Sarah never really knew Brian all that well. They were mere aquiantances. I got on the horn with Brian and asked if he was interested. He said hell yeah and invited us over Friday night.
The day finally came, and Sarah and i made our way.

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   I was slightly nervous. I didn't exactly know what kind of reprecussions this would hav eon our relationship. I began to worry? Could Brian outperform me? Could Sarah end up leaving me for Brian? Could Brian spill the beans about our little fool around? Could i contract an STD? Sarah may have been alot fo things, but a cheater wasn't one of them.
Honestly, all these thoughts mad eme fill up with lust, in a masochistic way. . . . . i didn't actually want them to happen and yet. . . . the risk factor excited me to no end.
We finall arrived at Brian's. No one was home.

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   All three of us smoked a bowl and just hung out for a little bit. I noticed Sarah and Brian were hitting it off pretty well, almost flirting with each other. My stomach churned a bit. Finally, i went to the bathroom to take a tiny piss which could've been held in. Was i subconcsiously trying to get Sarah to elope with Brian? Considering the fact i was high, it was very possible. I stayed in there for a couple of minutes. Finally, i walked back into the room. . . . . . and i stopped dead in my tracks as the two of them made out on Brian's bed. They looked at me and then continued to make out. I guess this was their way of breaking the ice.

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   We all took our clothes off, leaving us completely stark naked.

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I began making out with Sarah as Brian massaged and sucked her cute tits. She then switched back to Brian. . . . . i was disturbed by how their kiss was far more passionate. . . . . and yet turned on at the same time. I then proceeded to eat out her pussy as Brian put his dick in her mouth. She sucked him hard.

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  . . . harder then she ever sucked me. . . . . i felt sick to my stomach. . . . . i had obviously done my homework, as Sarah began a series of clitoral orgasms. Or maybe it was just the excitement of having a cock in her mouth while she had a tongue in her twat.

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   We all took a break, slightly exhausted. Brian began making out with her again. They were really going at it, groping each other. Sarah and i were pretty wild when we fooled around, but it was nothing like this. . . . . . . i knew what was happeneing right in front of me. . . . .

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  . .
So eventually i start making out with Sarah again, this time just as wildly as she was when she made with Brian a few minutes prior. . . . . Brian watched as we both caressed each other. . . . . Finally, we stopped. . .

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  . . . Brian was about to get ready to fuck her until she suggested something that still makes my stomach jump to this day. . . . . . "Hey. . . . you know. .

 

  . . this is a three way. . . . why don't you guys do some stuff?". . . . i was shocked. . . . Brian smirked as did i.

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  . . . . . i was sooooo turned on by the fact that my girlfriend wanted to see us do some shit. . . . . . . . Brian and i started making out as we groped each other's butts. .

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  . . . She seemed to enjoy watching this as she fingered herself the whole time throughout our interplay. . . . . Brian sucked my cock until i rolled him over on his stomach, grabbed a latex condom, and pounded his ass until came hard. . . . . . .

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  .
After a few minutes, Sarah said it was time. . . . . Brian slipped on a condom. . . . . Before he started fucking her she said "Wait!. . . .

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   i want to suck Chuck's cock while you fuck me from behind" and so she did. . . . . . eventually, i popped my cock out of her mouth and just watched the two of them fuck each other silly. . . . . . sarah was screaming, moaning. . .

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  . . . Brian smiled and made that sexy giggle the whole entire time. . . . . they looked good together. . . . . better than Sarah and i ever looked. .

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  . . . Eventually he came. . . . . . she didn't, however. . . . . to which i asked "Hey, can i fuck you now?" She said no, you're my father.

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   COnfused as fuck, i asked her to explain further. She said that she liked me but she could never fuck me because now i solidified the role of her father in her sexuality. "The Watcher". I knew what this meant right then and there. Brian was the molester. He was the only one she'd ever desire sexually. God was this confusing. . . . and heartbreaking, to say the least.
Eventually, we all got dressed and Sarah and i left. For the next few weeks, everything seemed somewhat normal. We talked about what had happened with Brian, not just what she told me in front the guy, but everything around it. The sex, everything.

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   We still made out and what not, but something was missing. For the next couple of months, i had subconciously put my blinders on. I knew something was going on. We didn't hang out as much and Brian had been added as friend on her myspace. Tenuous as this may sound, i still knew something was going on between them. . . . . and i was destined to find out.
One night when we hung out, i stole her phone and hid it in the backyard, that way when she called it, she wouldn't hear the ring. I told her i'd keep my eyes peeled for it. Finally, when she left, i checked her text messages. . .

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  . it was the moment of truth. . . . . . . and low and behold, there were all sorts of messages from Brian. They had met several times together. I was crushed, and yet turned on at the same time.
When i returned her phone, i knew i had to talk with her about this. So i did. She admitted that she cheated on me with Brian 5 times. I was.

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  . . . . ugh. . . . . . . I just broked it off with her right then and there. She said she didn't want a relationship with Brian but would only have sex with him. She brought up the idea of a tri-relationship to which i just laughed.  That night, i jerked off to the thought of both of them fucking each other's brains out.

 

   I came soooooo damn hard.
The next day, i knew there was something i needed to do. . . . . i went to talk with Brian. There was some yelling and screaming, but we eventually talked it out like men. He said he liked her sexually and romantically. However, she didn't feel the same way about him. I didn't believe him. Eventually i came forward and said that i didn't approve of the relationship and warned him to back the fuck off. He then blackmailed me by saying he would tell her about our little fuckathon that i lied about to Sarah. I was trapped. All i could do was watch them have a relationship.

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   Down i went off her top 8 on myspace, and up Brian went.
The next month was very painful. . . . . . . until she called me at the end of the month telling me they had broken up. At first, i jumped up with joy. . . . . and then my heart sank when she told me why.

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   She said Brian was annoying, far from boyfriend material. . . . . . but he had contracted HIV. . . . . . . . Thankfully, Sarah didn't get it.

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  . . . . but she felt guilty about leaving him, even though it had nothing to do with the fact that he contracted HIV to begin with. . . . . . . Brian would eventually die within the next year as his HIV qucikly metamorphisized into full blown AIDS. . . .

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   Chuck and Sarah didn't get back together, but remained friends. . . . . . for a little while, until they fell for each other again. . . . . . . . .

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5 years later, Chuck was invited to his buddy's wedding. He had never been to a wedding before, and was asked to invite one date. He hadn't spoken to Sarah in a year or so at that point, and decided to call her up. Delighted, she accepted his invitation. One thing led to another and they were back together for the 2nd time. . . . . Although Sarah didn't catch the bouquet at that wedding, that didn't stop her from being the next girl who became happily married to Chuck 2 years later. On the night of their honeymoon, they had sex for the first time. . . . .

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   and stayed happily married for the rest of their lives, completely faithful to one another. Chuck had finally become the missing piece to the jigsaw puzzle that was Sarah's sexuality. He was no longer just the watcher or father figure. He was everything she ever desired n another human being.
.