The Richard Chronicles: Part 1, Fear of Breast Cancer

Incest
2003-09-27

Michelle was Richard’s third child–his only with Molly. He has two grown children from his first marriage. He was now 45 and was looking at raising a ten-year old girl by himself. Michelle was the beneficiary of his years of experience parenting two children from his first marriage. He, Molly and Michelle were very close, because he wanted it that way and he worked very hard at it. When his first marriage ended in divorce, his first two children were under five years old. After the divorce, there were lots of fights and disagreements with his ex-wife about the raising of their children. He hoped to do a better job with a new family if and when he met a woman he could love and marry. That woman was Molly. Molly produced a daughter for them and they were very happy together. It was during lovemaking one night when Richard noticed a hardness in Molly’s breast that wasn’t there before as he was fondling it. The diagnosis was breast cancer which resulted in the removal of both of Molly’s breasts. She underwent two rounds of chemotherapy. It was during the second round of chemo that it was evident Molly’s cancer was not responding to treatment, rather, it was spreading. When it reached her liver, she was terminal. While Molly was still alive, she began making preparations to leave memories of herself for her husband and daughter.

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   She had several discussions with Richard about things he’d need to do once she was gone. Molly was very upset that she might not be there for Michelle’s first period or first boyfriend. She made videotapes of herself for the time when Michelle would be ready to view them. She tried to educate Richard about “girl stuff” that he would need to begin handling as Michelle enters puberty. Molly also had private Mother-Daughter times where she told Michelle to “take care of Daddy” for her when she’s gone. Molly died in the hospital just about the time Michelle completed the fourth grade. The night her mother died, Michelle didn’t want to leave her father’s side at all until she was too sleepy to remain awake. She was physically and emotionally exhausted, scared and deeply sad at the same time. For the first time, Richard allowed her to sleep in the bed he used to share with his wife. Molly was raised with the idea that the bed was always personal for the husband and wife and that children should never be allowed to share the bed that produced them. Molly knew it was a silly idea but that was the way she was raised. Michelle was too tired and overwhelmed by grief to even consider that it was very special that she was sleeping in her parents’ bed. The next day after Molly’s passing, Michelle’s Auntie Cassie came from out of state to stay with them to help out. She shared Michelle’s room and was her roommate for two weeks. Of course she wanted to stay longer but Cassandra had a job and family that demanded her return.

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  After Richard and Michelle dropped off Auntie Cassie at the airport, it was just father and daughter by themselves--Richard and Michelle were alone for the first time since Molly died. Richard cooked dinner at home for himself and Michelle. They talked, cried, hugged, talked, and washed dishes together. While finishing up the dishes, Richard asked, “You want to watch ‘Mary Poppins’ or something? Or, do you need to take a bath?”“Oh, Daddy, I don’t take baths anymore. I take showers. Don’t you think I’m a little old for ‘Mary Poppins’ now that I’ll be starting the fifth grade when school starts?”Richard smiled at her, “Yes, Little Girl, you are growing up, aren’t you?” He patted her on the top of her head. “We should make a plan about shopping for school–clothes, supplies, doctor’s–you are going out for soccer, aren’t you?”Michelle playfully kicked her father in the shin, “Of course, Daddy, you’re the one who told me I got game!”After her father kissed her goodnight–a quick peck on the lips--Michelle climbed into her bed. Within a few moments after her father closed her bedroom door, suddenly she felt very scared. She didn’t know if it was ghosts or spirits haunting about her room. She pulled the covers over her head but the fear and dread didn’t go away. She yelled, “Daddy!”Her father rushed out of bed and ran to his daughter’s bedroom. He saw a huddled mass under the covers. “I’m here, Michelle. ” At his voice, she threw the covers off and hugged her father tightly. She was shivering and crying.

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   He wrapped his arms around her and held her just as tight. “Do you want me to stay with you for a bit?”She nodded. She began calming down. “I’m scared, Daddy. ”Richard caressed her head and face, “I know. I’m scared, too. ” She looked up at him with big, wondering eyes. “It’s going to be tough without Mommy. But, she’d want us to take care of each other. ” Richard sensed that his daughter was not up to being alone in her room for the night. “What do you say to sleeping in my bed tonight?” She nodded her head against his chest and Richard felt her relax. He lifted her into his arms, picked up her pillow, and carried her into his bedroom. He placed his daughter on the side of the bed where his wife used to sleep. He moved Molly’s pillow and placed Michelle’s pillow next to it. She immediately curled into a fetal position facing away from her dad and closed her eyes.

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   Richard followed suit and positioned himself on his side facing away from Michelle. After he shut off the light, he felt Michelle position her butt to touch his backside. He automatically turned over to his other side and placed his right arm over his daughter as though he was protecting her. Michelle placed her hand over her dad’s hand for reassurance. After a few moments, he heard her soft rhythmic breathing indicating she was asleep. He relaxed and fell asleep too. This became part of their new routine. How long it would last, Richard didn’t know. At this point, with the death of her mother still fresh, he made sure he was available for his daughter. Michelle would shower at night, put on a pair of clean panties and then get into her nightgown. She would then climb into her father’s bed. Richard would finish up any personal business for the day and go to bed in his tee-shirt and his briefs. This was how he dressed for bed for years and he wasn’t about to change his habit. After about a week later, after Michelle went to sleep, Richard reviewed one of the files Molly had left with instructions for their daughter. “I wish I could be there to guide Michelle through her first period.

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   You’ll have to do it for me. In the box with the big number ONE, you’ll find a videotape. I had planned to watch it with Michelle. You should watch it first and decide whether you want to watch it with Michelle or have your sister or my sister watch it with her. ” The box also contained some sanitary napkins and tampons. Richard reviewed the tape and thought it was an excellent presentation about going through puberty. It was geared for both boys and girls who were about to go--or are currently going-- through puberty. He decided he would watch the tape with Michelle. The next morning, at breakfast, he told Michelle, “Mom had wanted to watch a special tape with you, but, since she’s not here anymore, she asked me to watch it with you. It’s about going through puberty. ”“Is this supposed to be my sex talk?”“Why, yes, it is!” Richard expressed surprise. “What--you don’t think you need it?”“Oh, it’s ok, I’ll watch it with you. ”Richard was surprised, “Alright, now I’m a bit concerned. How much do you know?”Giggling, Michelle revealed, “Don’t be silly, Daddy. I’ve seen R-Rated movies before.

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   You know, at friends’--spending the night, stuff. . . . ”Richard sighed, “OK, we’re going to watch this anyway. ” They both went into the den and Richard began the tape. He sat down next to Michelle and placed his arm around her. His daughter did not ask any question or make any comment during the show but she giggled a lot. “Are you embarrassed by any of this, Little Girl?”Laughing, “Gosh, no. Most of this stuff I already heard. You know, some of my friends do have older sisters. ” Mimicking people Richard never met, in an affected scratchy, nasally sullen voice, “Ohhh cramps–I need ibuprofen and tampons. ” He patted her on the top of her with his free hand, “My, my, my. My little girl is all grown up and sophisticated. ” He smiled at her.

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   “So, today I thought we should do some shopping for school. If you don’t mind, we’ll start downtown first–I need to stop by the office. ”She brightened at this. She always enjoyed going to her father’s office. Plus, sometimes her mother would treat her to a stop at one of her favorite ice cream shop where they sell one awesome praline flavored ice cream. “Can we also stop at that ice cream place that Mom always takes me to?”“Sure, Little Girl, anything for you. ”They got dressed and drove downtown. Richard and Michelle went into the firm where he worked. He was one of the members in a capital venture group. He also had a legal background which made him valuable to the limited liability corporation. He had already made arrangements for time off when Molly decided not to pursue any more radical--miracle–treatment. After Molly died, he wanted to spend the summer with Michelle before she started school. He quickly reviewed his mail and dashed off a few memos. Meanwhile, Michelle walked around what she called the “jungle maze” by herself, saying “hi” to everyone she knew. Darlene, one of Michelle’s favorite secretaries where her dad works, spotted her, “My, my, my.

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   You are such a pretty girl! We’re going to have to lock up all the boys! I’m surprised your dad let you out of the house! Wooo-eee! If you were my girl, I’d hire a guard to keep all those boys away!” Michelle turned crimson red. “OK, Little Girl, ready to do some serious shopping?” Michelle turned to see her dad. “Darlene, are you embarrassing her?”“I’m surprised you’d let her out of the castle. She’s going to break many hearts. ”Michelle and Richard smiled, “Bye, bye!”At one of the department stores, he asked Michelle about bras. She was embarrassed about it. “I usually wear the sports bra. ”“Sorry, Little Girl, I know you’re embarrassed about this–me being your daddy and all–but, it’s either me or wait until one of your aunts is in town. Otherwise, stiff-upper-lip and all that. It’s not like I’ve never seen a bra before or know that you’re becoming quite the Little Lady. ”“Oh, Daddy. Can you go get some coffee and a cookie or something? Just come back later. ”Richard noticed that a saleswoman was coming towards them and he figured he’d let his daughter handle this on her own. “OK, I’ll get some coffee in the café. I’ll come back in an hour?” She nodded and then turned to talk with the saleslady.

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  When Richard returned to the lingerie department, Michelle was ready. The credit card tab was a little over $200. “What did you buy? Silk panties?”Michelle turned bright red at this. No, it’s private. ”When they got home, Michelle took all her new clothes and shoes into her own bedroom. That night, after her shower, instead of going into her father’s bed, she went to her own bed in her bedroom. Richard pecked her on the lips goodnight and then went to his own room to sleep. Sometime during the night, Michelle left her own bed and climbed into her father’s bed. “Little Girl, what’s wrong?”In a voice that sounded like a sick child, “I don’t feel very well, Daddy. Can I sleep with you?”“Oh, sure. Do you have a fever?” He felt her forehead. It was moist but not hot. “Do you feel like throwing up?”“Sort of. ”“Do you need to poop?”“No. I just want to lay down.

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  ”“OK, Little Girl. ”He let her rest. Soon both fell asleep. About one o’clock in the morning, Michelle screamed, “Daddy! Help!”Richard woke up immediately and saw the light in the master bedroom turned on. He rushed into the bathroom and saw Michelle on the toilet looking panicked. “What’s wrong?!”“I’m bleeding! I don’t want to die!”“Show me where. ”She pointed to her to her vagina, “Here. ”Richard tried not to laugh. “Oh, dear. This is so strange. We just saw a video about this yesterday morning. ”“This is my period?!”“Yes. You’re alright. Here, are you done? Do you need to pee some more or poop–did you poop?” She shook her head vigorously. Richard looked at her panties and nightgown.

 

   They had sploshes of blood on them. Her panties were already off but she was holding up her nightgown. He looked into the toilet and saw the red coloration. “Do you want some help cleaning up?” She nodded, “Don’t leave me, Daddy. ” Richard noted a hint of panic still in her voice. He helped her out of her nightgown and told her to get into the tub. He turned on the water, grabbed a face cloth and, with his free hand, took the portable shower head. He began rinsing the blood off Michelle’s vagina, thighs, legs, ankles, and feet. This was the first time he saw his daughter naked, since she was six years old–the last time he gave her a bath. Her breasts were just starting to grow. He looked at them and thought they were so cute: nipples like little bee-bees with rose-colored aureolas on soft swollen mounds. She was neither fat nor skinny–she was proportionate. He could see her developing hour-glass figure–thanks to her mother’s genes. She was about 4 feet tall–maybe 4 feet and two inches, 70 or 75 pounds. Her pubic hair was just coming out and was very light.

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   He thought she had the most delectable vagina he had ever seen. He stopped using the washcloth and just soaped up his hand to wash his daughter from the waist down. He felt her butt--they were very soft. He looked at her belly-button and thought it was just perfect symmetrical. He used his right hand and lovingly washed his daughter’s vagina. As he was about to move his hand, she told him, “Wash it real good. I don’t want to see any blood. ”Richard used his index finger to clean her vagina. At first, he didn’t use the tip of the finger but the long length of it. Then, he used the first knuckle of his index finger to clean just between her vaginal lips. He then used the tip of his index finger--moving his finger in a tickling manner on her vagina and he could begin to feel some lubrication. He then slid his finger vertically up and down between her vaginal lips in a quickened pace. He wasn’t really thinking about his action. It was something he used to do to his wife to stimulate her clitoris during foreplay. He was doing the same thing to his little girl!His little girl began responding–rocking and moving in rhythm.

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   Her breathing became rapid and shallow. All of a sudden, Richard realized what he was doing. He stopped and used his open hand to wipe off the soap and excess water. He grabbed a towel and wrapped his little girl in it. “I think Mom may have bought some pads for you. I’m just going to step away for a minute, OK?” She nodded. Richard saw that she looked so small and helpless wrapped in a bath towel that covered her entire body. He found the napkins and brought them to his daughter. He didn’t know if she would be ready for tampons yet. He secured the napkin onto the belt. “OK, Michelle, you have two choices, use this belt thingy that’s sort of like a thong or use this panty liner. ”“I don’t want to get my panties dirty. ”“Your panties aren’t going to get dirty. Besides, there’s nothing dirty about this anyway. It’s perfectly natural.

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  ” He tried to reassure her that it was OK. In a kidding tone, he reminded her, “You saw the video today. What happened to the ‘give me ibuprofen and a tampon’ thing? Anyway, you’ll be sleeping next to me if you want. ”“Yes, Daddy. ”“Do you want a new nightgown?”“Can I wear one of your tee-shirts?”“Sure, Little Girl, whatever you want. ”He brought her one of his tee-shirts and helped her put it on. Then he carried her into his bed. She laid on her side and he held her close to his body. He began thinking about the last hour or so when he helped his daughter with her first menstrual cycle. He basically had an erection the entire time. She probably didn’t notice, since she was in a panic over her blood. He hadn’t thought about his daughter in a sexual way. After all, she’s not even a teenager yet. However, he had dealt with the issue when he first noticed that his first daughter at the age of twelve had cleavage--cleavage when she wore a nice dress for a recital; he was surprised when he found her to be quite sexy. At that time, after a lot of thought and analysis, he resolved the issue: if his daughter made sexual advances towards him, he probably wouldn’t fight it.

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   His first daughter never made sexual advances towards him, so it never became an issue. For Michelle, after additional analysis, he concluded: if Michelle made sexual advances towards him, he would not fight it. After a week, when her dad asked, Michelle told him that her first menstrual cycle went well. She took ibuprofen for some cramping and she learned to use the different pads and napkins available. She wasn’t about to stick a tampon into her vagina just yet. She made plans to spend the night with one of her friends, Carla. That left Richard a night alone in his house. He didn’t mind. It gave him a chance to pop in a porn DVD and masturbate–something he needed to do ever since washing his ten year old daughter’s body from her waist down. When he closed his eyes while the DVD was running, he masturbated to images of his daughter’s body, lovemaking with his wife, and the video’s action. They all blended and blurred. And he came. The next day Michelle arrived home after lunch. She rushed in with a panic. “Daddy, Daddy, check my breasts for cancer!” She immediately took her top off.

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  “Whoa, slow down, Michelle, what’s going on?” He sat her down on the sofa next to him. He had his arm around her shoulders. She was wearing one of her new bras–pink and cotton. Between tears, she explained, “I heard Carla’s mom talking to someone about me getting breast cancer like Mom. You have to check my breasts!”Rather than try to reason with his daughter in this state, he calmly helped her remove her bra. “Lay down on the couch. ” He knelt beside his daughter and initially used his fingers to feel around her breasts. Then, he began using his full hands to feel and knead her budding breasts. He could see her nipples become erect. He rubbed them with his fingers. He heard her breathing become shallow and quick. He asked, “Am I hurting you?”She moaned, “No. ”He noticed his erection and stopped. “OK, Little Girl, you don’t have any lumps. You’re in the clear.

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   You don’t have breast cancer. ”“Are you sure, Daddy?”“Yes, quite. Come on, you can get dressed now. ”That night, after dinner, as they were washing the dishes together, Michelle asked, “Daddy, can we take a bath together?” She looked up at her dad with big wondering eyes. “Sure, Little Girl, whatever you want. Is there a reason for this? After all, you don’t take baths anymore. ”“Whenever I felt bad, Mom would take a bubble bath with me. I always felt better. I know you’re not Mommy, but you’ll have to do. Is that OK?”“Oh, sure, yes, OK, whatever you want, Little Girl. ” Needles to say, Richard was very surprised by this. “Do you know where Mom kept the bubble bath?”“Yeah. I’ll go get the bath ready. ” There was a lilt in her voice as she dashed off into the master bathroom. When he went into the master bathroom, Michelle was already in the over-sized bathtub.

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   It was one of those combination bathtub, whirlpool, and shower. He saw a very sexy girl in his tub. His daughter watched him as he undressed. He was semi-erect as he got into the tub. He noted that she had a hint of mischief in her eyes. Michelle hurried over to him and squeezed his “breasts. ” She giggled, “Your boobies are bigger than mine, Daddy. ”He grabbed her arms and pulled her into him against his chest. “Is that why you wanted to take a bath together? To touch my boobies?”Laughing, “No, Daddy. I was just curious. When you checked my breasts for cancer, it felt sorta good. I’m curious about yours. Can you do it again? You know, check my breasts for cancer?”“Sure, Little Girl, anything you want. ” Richard turned her around, so that her backside was against his front. He began gently massaging and kneading his daughter’s small and soft breasts.

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  Michelle began scratching her vaginal region, “It kind of itches down there, Daddy. Is there something wrong with me? Can you check it for cancer like the way you do it for my breasts?”“Sure, Little Girl, whatever you want. But, I don’t think you have cancer” Richard reassured her. With his left hand massaging her right breast, he reached down to her vagina with his right hand and began lightly caressing and massaging it and then playing with it. He noticed Michelle closing her eyes as her breathing became shallow and rapid. He gently used his middle index finger to stimulate her clitoris. He began to feel her move in motion to the rhythm. After what seemed like several moments, he felt her tense up, signaling that she was about to reach orgasm. His daughter orgasmed with a violent shuddering. When the shuddering subsided, Richard felt his daughter relax completely. She turned around so that she was facing her father. She surprised him when she kissed him on the lips. Richard noticed that it wasn’t the usual peck or quick lip buss they normally gave each other when kissing each other goodnight. He sensed his daughter was trying to give him a “real” kiss!He helped her out by moving her body up a notch so that their heads were more level to each other. He cupped her face with his right hand.

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   “Here, Michelle, let me show you how Mommy and Daddy kiss. Just do what I do. ” With that, he opened his mouth slightly and pressed it against Michelle’s lips. He flicked his tongue into her lips. She was a quick learner. She frenched kissed her father as she wrapped her arms around his neck. When they broke off the kiss, she whispered into her father’s ear, “I love you, Daddy. ”“I love you, too, Little Girl,” Richard whispered back. As Richard readjusted his seating position, Michelle slid down to the point where her bottom touched her father’s very erect penis. She turned around with her backside to her father and reached for his penis with her right hand. Richard sensed she did it out of curiosity. “It gets hard when I get excited. Touching you and kissing you the way I did with Mommy got me excited. ”Michelle slid off slightly to the side in the tub, still holding her father’s penis, and looked at him, “It’s so big! It looks kind of funny, like a deformed hot dog. ”“Actually, my penis is kind of small.

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   There are other men with bigger ones. ” Mine was at three and a half inches when fully erect When not erect, it’s an inch long. “It’s getting smaller now. Does that mean you’re not excited anymore?” She looked at her father with what looked like disappointment. “It can get excited again if you kind of pump it up and down with your hand. Here, let me show you, OK?” She nodded but kept looking at her hand wrapped around her father’s penis. Richard placed his hand over his daughter’s and began pumping it up and down. He let go when she got the hang of it. He could see that she got excited herself when his penis became hard again in her hand. She began using both her hands. As his daughter was pumping his penis, Richard pulled the plug to drain the water from the tub. Michelle got more enthused as she saw what she was doing and how her father was responding. “I’m going to add some conditioner to your hands as you’re pumping, OK? Just keep jerking it up and down. ” Richard grabbed the hair conditioner and squeezed some of it onto her hands as she kept pumping. He kept in rhythm to his daughter’s pumping.

 

   Within a moment or so–he lost track of time-- he ejaculated. Michelle stopped when she saw the eruption. She was just fascinated by it, “Ooooh, your penis just threw up!”With a smile, “It’s called: ejaculation. It’s what happens when that highest point of excitement is reached. I’d tell you to go ahead and smell it but it’s kind of mixed in with the hair conditioner. The white stuff that shot out of my penis is the sperm. ”“Sperm--I know–from the video. So, this is what it looks like. ” She examined the ejaculate closer. She looked at her father with a look that he interpreted as wanting more information. “When babies are made, the woman has a vagina,” he made a fist with his left hand and then began inserting and pulling out his index finger from his fist several times, “when a man inserts his penis into a woman’s vagina, and he ejaculates, that’s how babies are made. It doesn’t work very well if both the man and woman are not excited. ”Comprehension seemed to dawn on her as she considered, “So, these are sorta like little half babies. ” She smiled at her dad. He smiled back at her and bent to kiss her.

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   It was automatic that he purse his lips for a lip peck but his daughter did not respond with a lip peck. She opened her mouth and moved her tongue into her father’s mouth. They had a long french kiss and he felt his penis stir–blood rushing to its head. She broke it off and whispered, “I love you, Daddy. ”He responded, “I love you, Michelle. ” He helped her get up and turned on the shower. “We need to rinse ourselves off a bit and then let’s dry off, OK?” After the rinse, Richard and Michelle got out of the tub. Richard gave a towel to his daughter and grabbed one for himself. After drying off, they brushed their teeth and then headed to his bedroom. They held each other’s hand as they walked out of the bathroom. As they headed to the bedroom, Michelle looked up at her father and asked, “Daddy, can you check my breasts and vagina for cancer before we go to sleep–please?”“Whatever you want, Little Girl, whatever you want. ”NOTE: Breast cancer is a very serious illness. I did not intend to make light of it. Please feel free to make any comments or criticism about this work. It's my very first submission anywhere.

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   I hope it won't be my last. .